You first feel it in your gut, that uneasy feeling you get when you’re around someone who is not good for you, who doesn’t have the best intentions, you just feel that something is off; their words don’t sound very honest, their eyes don’t look very kind and their energy doesn’t feel light.
You then slowly realize that you can’t express yourself because you’re trying to avoid another argument or you know that no matter what you say, you’ll never be truly heard or understood. You start sounding like a broken record until you stop the record altogether.
You then gradually start losing respect for that person over their lies or their lack of commitment or their shady actions. Something stops you from giving because you feel like that’s all you ever do; give, and while that’s something to admire, sometimes giving so much to the wrong person drains you and leaves you feeling empty.
You begin to enjoy your time without them, you begin to like your solitude again because even when you’re with them, you feel alone, you feel distant, you feel isolated from the world and from yourself. You begin to understand what people meant when they said it’s better to be alone than with someone who makes you feel alone.
And that’s when you will understand what a good relationship should feel like. It should bring you joy most of the time, not just occasionally, it shouldn’t be a burden, it shouldn’t make you lose yourself or your dignity or your voice. A good relationship will never make you regret giving away a big chunk of your heart or your time.
There are two ways to know if you’re in the right or wrong relationship, at the end of the day do you walk away with so much less or do you walk away with so much more? Do you walk away feeling like this is the beginning or the end? Do you feel that you’re better off together or you’re better off alone?
Because even though it sounds so obvious, when you’re invested in someone, the lines are blurred and it’s astounding the lies we tell ourselves and the excuses we make for people so we can have them in our lives a little longer but at the end of the day, just like a negative mind will never bring you a positive life, the wrong person will never bring you the right kind of love. The wrong person will always keep you questioning yourself, your life and your love but the right person will be right there beside you, trying to answer all these questions with you.
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